Handbook for Parents 3
Co-parenting

Co-parenting Tips

• The biggest obstacle in co-parenting is your emotions. Shifting the focus on your children can help you let go of the negativity.


• When discussing about your children with your ex-partner, try to let go of old grudges and not to bring up what he/she has done wrong in the past. Criticism, mocking, and threat are also unhealthy for the relationship.


• Instead of figuring out ways to win the fight or argument, your priorities should be around what’s best for the children.


• Focus on the present and the future, stay in the reality and aim for efficiency. Try and build a co-worker type of relationship with your ex-partner.


• Avoid having heated conversation or conflicts in front of your children (such as during child contact or exchange). If needed, schedule another time and someplace else for settling controversial issues.


• Listen to your children’s thoughts. Do not force your children to pick side between you and your ex-partner.


• You and your ex-partner will most likely have different parenting disciplines, but you both should always try and do things in a consistent way. If compromising seems impossible, embrace the difference and make sure your children are clear of the rules in different homes.


• Align on a way of communication that can work for both you and your ex-partner when discussing about your children, may it be face-to-face, via phone, text, or email.


• Consider scheduling regular meetings (could be once a month) with your ex-partner to discuss about your children’s life and their school performance.


• Both parents should get together every now and then to evaluate this co-parenting arrangement, make new plans or adjustments according to the development of your children.


• Inform each other of any change of status (could be financially or about marital status) in order to keep both sides up to date and discuss way out.


• Both parents should communicate with each other on a frequent basis, and update one another of any new contacting method.


• If agreements are impossible to be reached, please seek help from third parties such as your trusted relatives, social worker, or mediator etc.